The Janny’s gettin heavy ragin at the moment. Like that time big Tam Tam Clifford took 2 microdots an gobbed his ain clipper. Had the butane runnies fer a few weeks. Cunt pure loved gas like. Wan time at his breher’s weans communion he smashed a full tin eh Ronson an played aboot wi the priest’s lips fir 20 long fuckin minutes. Kinda like the condition am in the now.
Right… so whit aboot this fuckin Gok Wan prick? If his boggin’ show came tae the Parkhead Forge I guarantee ad skull 10 vallies an a litre eh mead, get shirtless oan that shitey catwalk an roll scrappy joints fir the fat rides oan the side gaggin fir a sniff eh the Janny’s smelly brush. In fact, ah reckon I could dae his show better;-
“How to Look Good Blazin” with Fat Jan.
First ad git they big hummin’ disaster burds flung oot eh JP Bingo's night club in Hamilton
1: Eat yer steak bake wi yer fuckin’ mouth shut ye smelly cunt.
2: Daint run intae big Tony MaraGubbin’s chippy an tax the rid sauce, cos he’ll fuckin’ smash yir foreheed right aff and tear aff yir bird’s goblin thighs. And don’t use yir clearly pish negotiation skills tae git 70p aff a sassy supper ya fuckin’ omniclown.
3:Always gub 2 grams ah MDMA an try tae chat up hoff blazin chippy burds headin hame oan the 66 tae Calderwood. Offer her a bit eh the honey ham ye taxed oot eh Somerfield, guarantee you’ll get a sniff eh the meat dungeon.
4: Rip aff all the stuck on Job skins fae yir boggin Cica trainees an fling oan a full can eh Lynx Pulse before ye go tae work.
5: Dae hunners eh menshies like this:
"Directed and produced by Fran Jambalana and Gerry Allsorts"
"Original concept written on the toilet wall of Bobby Shingles Bar by an intoxicated janitor"
